Always Judge a Book by its Cover

Some books win awards, some win our heart, and others... only serve to confuse.

Anybody Can Be Cool, But Awesome Takes Practice

Cool people? They’re a dime a dozen. Look left, look right, there they are. But Awesome people… that’s a whole different thing.

Practicing being Awesome with a capital A is a difficult task, with many sub awesome tasks that you will need to overcome on your quest to the guy on the cover of this book… lighting up his audience with an eye wateringly beautiful tale of how when he wakes up in the morning, the sun looks to him to see if it should rise.

It may take more than one read through, but over time this book will open you up to the possibility of being awesome.

Leonidis, before leading his Spartans into the grueling battle ahead, often quoted this book as to one of his main influences and sources of strength.

Anybody Can Be Cool on Amazon

Do It Yourself Coffins for Pets and People

If you’re a fan of the darker side of literature, this one is for you.

Edgar Allan Poe wept, whilst reading the ever macabre “Do it yourself coffins”, for he knew that there was a whole new dimension of darkness that could be bled from the pages.

Whether you’re the amateur coffin maker or the do-it-yourself planner of the future, you shouldn’t browse without at least considering this beauty.

Now, this doesn’t go without warning, if you’re the perfectionist looking for the perfect place to rest your head, reviews of this book suggest there are many some improvements that can be made… for those, I guess we’ll be waiting for the second edition.

Do It Yourself Coffins on Amazon

Walmart Atlas

The only atlas you’ll ever need.

Imagine this, you get back from a busy day in the city. You’re tired of your job and the endless grind. You open your Walmart Atlas. Closing your eyes, you start flicking through the pages with your keyboard-calloused fingers. You slap your index finger down on a random page.

The famous Walmart of Omaha, Nebraska.

Your eyes light up, that’s it! You book the flights immediately, not an ounce of doubt in your mind.

You jet to Nebraska, and go straight to the mart! The deals are amazing. The food is amazing. Your problems are gone! All because of this amazing resource.

Walmart Atlas on Amazon

How to Make a Towel Monkey and other Cruise Ship Favorites

One of the worlds greatest mysteries finally revealed.

There are many things that keep me up at night… the mysteries entangled within the Bermuda Triangle, the DaVinci Code, and the sock missing from the washing machine… the secret of the towel monkey was another of the universes most tightly kept secrets until this tell-all exclusive!

If you’ve ever tried to painstakingly deconstruct a towel monkey, in step-by-step meticulous detail, you will have fallen into the same traps as I did. When you eventually try to piece it back together you’re left with a wrinkled towel with a couple of ugly twists resembling more of a twisted sweat rag than a monkey.

It might be hard to believe, but with this first edition book, the elusive towel monkey will suddenly be in your grasp!

How to Make a Towel Monkey on Amazon How to Make a Towel Monkey on Kindle

Mom is Dating Weird Wayne

Find out what mom is up to next in this exciting hit.

Oh no! You wake from a nightmare and remember that your mom is still dating weird Wayne.

This book is more of a guidebook than a novel: how to come up with creative ways to distract and disturb your mother as she tries to re-enter the dating world and become happy again.

An extra disturbing feature of this book is that there is one on sale (at the time of writing) for over $800… I guess good advice is hard to come by these days.

Mom is Dating Weird Wayne on Amazon

People Who Don't Know They're Dead: How They Attach Themselves to Unsuspecting Bystanders and What to Do About It

Has someone dead attached themselves to you? This guide will help you, and them, move on.

There is a wonderful duality to this book. Its the kind that will help you if you’re healthy and alive, but also, if you’re the kind of introspective dead person it will also be a very useful resource.

The real treasure of this beauty is the chapters on attachment to unsuspecting bystanders, which again are relevant to both the living and dead.

People Who Don't Know on Amazon People Who Don't Know on Kindle

Better Never to Have Been: The Harm Of Coming Into Existence

The very thought of sitting down to write, and deciding that the knowledge you wish to share with the world is purely what the world would be like without you in it… gives me the strangest kind of chills.

If you ever lie awake wondering about the butterfly effect… what small things you’ve done in the world that have had massive repercussions, then this book is not for you, because after it you’ll actually just straight up stop sleeping.

That said, if you’re in a deep, dark, “You don’t know me dad or what I’m going through!” kind of mood, perhaps the idea of exploring life without humans interference is actually going to be fun! You might learn something too!

Better Never to Have Been on Amazon Better Never to Have Been on Kindle